It’s been 12 weeks.  12 weeks since I gave birth to my daughter, Eva Elizabeth.  It feels like yesterday. 

As you lie asleep in your cot, I stare in amazement.  I am so incredibly proud of you.  Words just cannot even begin to describe.  I read my Birth Story over and over – If I had to have only written it now, it would be a totally different story.  Less pain and an unbelievably overwhelming TRIUMPH!!  I created and gave Birth to YOU!! I get a lump in my throat.  It is just beyond me what I have conquered and overcome personally… what is there to fear now?! What a gift I was given being able to give Birth to you naturally.  I needed too; for you and me.

You are growing beautifully.  You are wonderful.  You are ever so precious. You are hard work.  But you are worth it.

What I love about you…

The way you nuzzle your face into my neck when you are tired

Your, head backward-bum out-legs curled, stretch you do when I pick you up from your nap

The way you talk to me – it melts my heart

Your delightful smile when you see my face

Your sweet moans when you suck your dummy drifting off to sleep

The sheer delight on your face as I am preparing to feed you

Your very content face after I have fed you and when you throw me that big gummy grin

The way your head droops and you safely fall asleep in the palm of my hand whilst I burp you

The way your eyes smile at your daddy when he gets home from work; and the cry when he leaves in the morning

When your tiny fingers wrap around mine and you feel safe

and what you have taught me…

You are tired a lot and I never really realised

No day is ever the same for you – I find I just cannot predict you

You are simply learning about our world and how to cope in it

You can be just as frustrated as me sometimes

Your cries are simply hunger or tiredness

You are actually quite content – It’s me who is uptight

You are a 20 minute nap-er and that is OKAY

You will fall asleep when you will; my job is merely allowing you too

So, my precious girl, this I promise you…

I promise to mother you as best as I possibly can. I promise to love you unconditionally and to show it to you. You, my precious ‘gift’, I shall cherish you.  I want not to force you.  I want life’s challenges to be overcome comfortably.  I want you to feel love and give love.  I want joy and happiness to swell within you.

I want for you to be free.